Three weeks ago I got a phone call that I will never forget. My dad, unexpectedly and without explanation, had passed away. There are no words to describe what it was like to receive this kind of news. Nothing can prepare you for loosing one of the people you love most in the world. After I got over the initial shock, I was engulfed with the kind of grief that was so intense I almost couldn't breath.
We immediately booked a flight a left for Utah the next morning. The next couple of weeks were emotionally and physically exhausting. I was amazed at the outpouring of love and support that we received from friends and family members. I was also amazed at the peace and comfort that I received from my Father in Heaven. I am so grateful for my knowledge of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I have no doubt that I will see my dad again. I know that he is happy. I have still had difficult times over the last couple of weeks, and I'm sure there are more to come. I am still grieving; hearing a Dave Matthews song or walking by the pharmacy counter at Walmart is enough to start a flood of tears. But I am at peace.
Yesterday, one of the Sisters in my ward asked me, "what was your dad like?" I didn't even have to think before replying, "He was amazing." I feel so blessed to have been raised by such an amazing person. My dad was kind and fun to be around. He was always cracking (stupid) jokes that you had to laugh at (even if it was just a courtesy laugh). My dad was always so supportive of me; I could always spot him in the audience at piano recitals, tumbling meets, softball games and dance competitions. I never had any questions about the way my dad felt about me, he let me know every day of my life that he loved me and that he was proud of me. He also let me know how much he loved my husband and kids. I loved to watch him play and interact with my kids, they always had so much fun together. I am so grateful for the time we had to spend together, and for all the memories we made. I love you, Dad!
Colby's Medical School Graduation May 2009
Washington D.C. March 2009
Skiing at snowbird. December 2006
Meeting Abigail. November 2008
Giving Ammon a motorcycle ride. Summer 2007
Skiing with dad. Winter (around 1987?)
Sealed in the Salt Lake Temple.
Family pictures 1981.
Me, Dad and Jen 1979.
9 comments:
I love this Shauni. Thanks for sharing such tender feelings. I don't know how it feels to KNOW that I am loved by my dad- but reading this reminds me why my children need to feel that from me. I will make lots of mistakes, but showing my kids that I love them every day won't be one of them. I have never met your dad- but I can't help but feel inspired by him.
Shauni,
I have no words that could comfort you at this time... just know i am so sorry. i can't even imagine what you are going through. know that i love you & i am here for you if you need to talk. i wish i could put my arms around you & give you a big hug!! [i hope to do that at christmas though]:)) you are in my thoughts & prayers. if you need anything please let me know! love all the pictures. what a beautiful tribute. He loved you so much! I love you my friend. You are beautiful inside & out.
miss your guts!
love,
heather
Love the photos. I wish there was something I could say or do that would make things easier.
When are you coming back from Utah? We still need to get together.
Oh Shauni, I am so sorry for your loss. I'm not sure what else to say other than I'm glad that there are many happy memories and that you find comfort in knowing you'll see your Dad again. The picture from the seventies is priceless.
Thanks for sharing Shauni. I loved seeing these sweet pictures of your dad. Love, Jill
Oh Shauni. I'm sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is heartbreaking, I can imagine. Wish there was something I could do or say to help ease your grief. I'm sure your dad was an amazing man and that he passed on so many of his great traits on to you.
Shauni, Shauni, Shauni....I LOVE you!! I loved chatting the other day. I am crying reading this post and want nothing more than to see you and give you the biggest hug! You are so right - you dad was amazing and he is happy in heaven right now. I wish so bad that I could take some of your grief for you - I guess that's what our Savior does, right? You have been in my thoughts and prayers. Love you!!!
Shauni, I have been thinking about you a lot lately. I am so sorry your Dad passed away so unexpectedly. He was a great Dad, you could always tell that he really loved his family and they meant so much to him. Thanks for sharing.
Love this post. Love the pictures. So sweet. I'm so sorry for your loss.
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